Melanie Jongsma and I have had some interesting conversations about a weekly Bible study she has had for the past year with her Jehovah’s Witness neighbor. Melanie relates to me how this exchange 1) has turned into a relationship and 2) has given her new insights about evangelism – how we do it and how it is perceived. As she is being evangelized, it makes her realize how offensive it can come across to the person who is the object of our efforts. No one likes to be made to feel like a project or to have their viewpoints or convictions demeaned, diminished or dismissed.
In a conversation with Greg Saint Victor about outreach, I asked the question, “Do we engage or enrage the culture?” I shared with him a picture of a billboard erected by a church that invites the public to meet a God who is angry with them over the sin of homosexuality, abortion and being a Democrat.
Over dinner one night I quizzed Dr. Tim and Robin Basselin about the best approach to sharing our faith with followers of Islam. I shared that I thought that most Christians are wholly unprepared and unskilled at being able to communicate their faith in “non-Christian terms – ie, without “Christian-ese” or Biblical references or an invitation to come to church. They mentioned a book to me – UnChristian – that shares the results of research conducted by the Barna group. The researchers conclude the following:
“Christianity has an image problem. Christians are supposed to represent Christ to the world. But according to the latest report card, something has gone terribly wrong. Using descriptions like “hypocritical,” “insensitive,” and “judgmental,” young Americans share an impression of Christians that’s nothing short of . . . unChristian. Groundbreaking research into the perceptions of sixteen- to twenty-nine-year-olds reveals that Christians have taken several giant steps backward in one of their most important assignments.”
Here is one example of their findings:
“We found the three most common perceptions of present-day Christianity are anti-homosexual (an image held by 91 percent of young outsiders), judgmental (87 percent), and hypocritical (85 percent). Out of the top 12 perceptions of Christianity, nine of the dozen views were negative. (Pg 27).”
As I read Colossians 4 this morning, verses 5 and 6 jumped out at me: “Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone.”
Does this describe your conversation and relationship with non-believers? Are they engaged or enraged by your presence and interactions with them?
Paul exhorts us to “put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him” (3:10), reminding us that “since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful” (3:12-15).
I know that here Paul is speaking of how Christians should relate to fellow believers, but should not this same gracious style of living also be reflected in how we relate to those who don’t believe as we do? Is it not the gracious nature of our lives that opens the door to speak the gracious words of the Good News? Is it not the Good News, rather than our angry arguments or vitrolent denouncements that empowers life transformation?
This same Good News that came to you is going out all over the world. It is bearing fruit everywhere by changing lives, just as it changed your lives from the day you first heard and understood the truth about God’s wonderful grace (1:6).
Is God pleased if unbelievers cannot be attracted by His love, because they are distracted by our anger? Didn’t Jesus say that the world will know that we are Christians by our love (as opposed to the law)?
One final word from the authors of UnChristian:
As Christians, we have to avoid being defensive about the culture’s push to remove Christianity’s power in society. This book never advocates that we try to become more popular. Our task is to be effective agents of spiritual transformation in people’s lives, whatever that may cost in time, comfort, or image. Yet we have to realize that if the enormous number of Christians in this country has not achieved the level of positive influence hoped for, it’s not the fault of a skeptical culture.
I think it’s time that we take a critical look at ourselves in the mirror to evaluate the effectiveness of our witness to the culture. We don’t need to water down the truth to make it attractive. But we do need to be careful to sweeten it with love and season it with salt to take away the bitter edge of doubt and skepticism.
You can read more about “unchristian”, including downloading excerpts and a summary of their findings at www.unchristian.com.
What do you think?
Pastor Jason
Jason Perry
dizenbart
5 comments
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December 20, 2011 at 12:44 pm
Melanie Jongsma, Wordsmith
I too was struck by a number of verses from Colossians 4 this morning. The word “among” struck me in verse 5: “Live wisely AMONG those who are not believers….” We Christians spend so much time and energy protecting ourselves FROM unbelievers, or defending ourselves AGAINST unbelievers, and even proclaiming truth (but not grace) TO unbelievers that it’s no wonder they don’t find us “gracious and attractive.”
I was recently participating in an online conversation around the question, “What keeps you from sharing your faith with others?” I posted an answer saying that knowing how offensive I can be, and knowing what a poor opinion unbelievers have of Christians, often makes me hesitate to share. In reply to that, a pastor posted that we can’t be afraid of the world hating us, because Jesus promised that the world would hate His disciples. He went on to share how proud he is to preach the Truth, even when it’s not popular. And I got the impression that he considered himself very courageous for saying the hard things to people who need to hear it. But is that what Jesus had in mind? I don’t think so.
When I see signs like the one in the photo you posted, I literally grieve. It’s hard enough to do the work of evangelism, without having to UNdo the work of Christians who consider THAT evangelism.
December 22, 2011 at 8:52 am
Jason Perry
The word “grace” is the key. As I was preparing to write the post, the thought that kept coming to mind was that I have no recollection of Jesus ever condemning non-believers. Jesus said that “God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him. “There is no judgment against anyone who believes in him. But anyone who does not believe in him has already been judged for not believing in God’s one and only Son. And the judgment is based on this fact: God’s light came into the world, but people loved the darkness more than the light, for their actions were evil” (John 3:17-19). Jesus loved people, spoke truth, lived truth and let people respond to what they saw and heard. We would do well to follow His example and not be so quick to close the deal or write people off.
Yes, Jesus said the world would hate us, but that shoud not be because we are being hateful or insensitive, but because our light is exposing their what they want to keep hidden and because it is evident that change is possible.
December 22, 2011 at 8:55 am
Jason Perry
Melanie has a great post reflecting on her Jehovah’s Witness experience. Please read it at http://lifelinespublishing.net/2011/03/30/5-things-this-christian-is-learning-from-the-jehovahs-witnesses/
December 22, 2011 at 2:10 pm
Evelyn Webb
Sometimes as Christians we forget that Jesus loved the sinner but not the sin. Living by example instead of exhortation makes a much better impression on non-believers. When they question about why we live a certain way or don’t participate in some activities, then we can honestly say why we believe such actions are wrong for us. That way the emphasis is on us and not them. We plant the seed, but God does the reaping. Leading by example isn’t always easy I find, especially when my grandchildren bring their unbelieving friends over. But I make no apologies for my beliefs. My home is always open and I’m always ready to listen but my rules are to be obeyed…no swearing no drinking or smoking in my house and no suggestive language. Still they come at ALL hours and talk my ears off. By welcoming these young people regardless of their race or creed, I feel that I’m showing Jesus’ love.
December 22, 2011 at 3:18 pm
Jason Perry
Thank you for your comments, Ev. Living as a witness among non-believers doesn’t require that we have standards and guidelines or that we back off of our convictions. Actually, I think that non-believers are put off when we fail to stand up for our convictions.